The other day I was driving to work, and it took me at least twenty minutes longer than it should have. As usual. The reason is a really scary phenomenon that's growing in my neighborhood: Good parents. These are the people who crowd their SUV's around every street corner, with their children inside, waiting for the school bus.
It creates a traffic jam. Just as bad, when the school bus arrives, it takes extra time for the parents to open the car doors, kiss their youngins good bye, and wave to them as they shamble off to another day of school.
It sounds like a good idea to keep the kids in from the cold and the rain and even severe sunshine.
Last week I saw about a dozen SUV's at one corner, and the as the kids emerged, each had to get an emotional good bye from mommy that backed up traffic a good couple of blocks. Then the parents came out, and waved, putting on a display like they were waving goodbye to folks headed off to a year at war. Not a day at a school a good half mile away. So stop behaving as though you're at the docks and watching troop ships sail off into a salvo of torpedoes.
You think it's important, as the world is full of cold, rain, severe sunshine and a molester behind every tree. Plus, there just be one kid around here without the privilege of being embarrassed by overprotective adults on a daily basis.
I suspect if this had been the fashion when I was in elementary school, I would have grown into an even more disturbed, rage-filled malcontent than I am now. It's one thing to be traumatized by cold, rain, and severe sunshine, but it was quite another to be embarrassed by overprotective parents. In my day any kid escorted to and from the bus stop by mommy or daddy would have been elected as the Mayor of Fairyland Forest.
As for all those molesters hiding behind trees, don't worry about them, overprotective mommy and daddy. From what I see every morning, you bred a race of fat, ugly dumbass mutants, and nobody would want to molest them. Your spawn is enough to drive Michael Jackson to healthy relationships with adult women.
So folks, get off the street, take your SUV's with you, and get the hell out of my way when I want to get to work. Besides, if you really loved your mutants, you'd realize that cold, snow, and all that godawful harmful sunshine is preferable to embarrassment that you inflict.