Tiger Woods: My Corporate Sponsors Inform Me That I Am Genuinely Sorry I Dick-Shanked It into the Strange-Bunker

I am a robot.

Your human mating rituals are illogical.

I have regret I stuck my R2-plug into some cyber-floozie's love-socket.

My programming will not fail me again.

I know I my decisions have been questionable lately, Dave, but I assure you I have full enthusiasm for our mission to Jupiter.

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Comment by Jim Werbaneth on February 21, 2010 at 11:40am
Yes, usually we hear the passive voice of "Mistakes were made, much to my regret," the kind of language that doesn't even admit who made the mistakes. However, Tiger was like a robot, and after watching it, and reviewing some of it two and three times, I'm convinced that this was intended solely for his sponsors. He doesn't really mean it, and the next time that he sees a hot cocktail waitress with fake boobs, he's chasing her like a hyperactive dog after a car.
Comment by Dan Stueber on February 21, 2010 at 11:31am
I saw the whole interview on the news. He was very, very robotic throughout.

I did think he did well by admitting he was at fault. So many people do not.

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